Fresh eggs, next left.
Tuesday 20th June 2017
Albert Einstein's definition of insanity was famously 'Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.'
By this measure I'm clearly a madman because as an adopted Londoner of ten years, every time summer rolls around I repeat the same mantra: 'This year I'm definitely going to get out and spend a bit more time in the countryside.' Yet I never do.
You see, I'm nostalgic for the childhood stuffy car journeys to my native Yorkshire dales. Picnics on grassy river banks, pub meals by roaring fires or visits to chintzy tea shops in some stone clad hamlet. I miss it, I really do.
So you can picture my disappointment at spending every weekend winding through picturesque villages and country lanes on the way to work, imagining how nice it would've been to set off just an hour earlier to factor in a stop and feel just the lightest touch of rural England's calming hand on my shoulder.
Well last week we had gigs in Norfolk and Shropshire (because even though we're a London function band, we travel all over the country, don't you know!), a triangular trip which involved dissecting the country via a Travelodge in Grantham...rock n roll, I know.
During our journey we realised we'd be passing through the village of Melton Mowbray, the home of pork pies and Stilton cheese! This is it I thought, a chance to jump out the van for a second and live out my recurring summer fantasy! After a quick google we found 'Ye Olde Pie Shoppe' seemingly the epicentre of the great British pork pie and surely the place to go. And we had LOTS of time to kill.
We eagerly bounded along as our iPhones directed us, but as we turned the corner...disaster struck. We stood, slack jawed and offended like commuters realising they have to wait more then 3 minutes for a tube, as we realised it was shut on Sundays (we're not used to this). And, aside from a smattering of big name chain stores, everything was shut this Sunday. I guess you have to be careful what you wish for when looking to go back in time.
Cue 3 grumpy, hungry and extremely dejected musicians.
"...I'm starving now.."
"There's a Burger King over there, that's open.. shall we just do that?"